Day 12- Jesus

When you look at the Nativity and see how Christ came into the world, you can see how He, even from the beginning, had to descend below all things. He wasn’t born in a clean room with warm water. We wasn’t born with a physician standing by ready to help Mary and Joseph. He was born in the most humble of circumstances, in a stable surrounded by filthy animals and unclean straw. Elder Jeffrey R. Holland stated, “He would do so to help those who also felt they had been born without advantage.” Being born in such a manner is truly a gift to us, as was His life and death here on earth.
In Moroni 7:48 it says, “Wherefore, my beloved brethren, pray unto the Father with all the energy of heart, that ye may be filled with this love, which he hath bestowed upon all who are true followers of his Son, Jesus Christ; that ye may become the sons of God; that when he shall appear we shall be like him, for we shall see him as he is; that we may have this hope; that we may be purified even as he is pure.” President Henry B. Eyring said of this scripture, “That ought to help you understand why any believing Latter-day Saint is an optimist about what lies ahead for him or her, however difficult the present may be. We believe that through living the gospel of Jesus Christ we can become like the Savior, who is perfect. Considering the attributes of Jesus Christ should quash the pride of the self-satisfied person who thinks he or she has no need to improve. And even the most humble person can take hope in the invitation to become like the Savior.”
Because Christ was born, lived, and died for us we do have hope. Like what President Eyring said no matter how difficult life may seem right now, you have someone you can turn to. You have someone who lived His life so you could live forever and be happy. Know that Jesus loves you. His birth and life is evidence of that. So as you celebrate His birth tonight and tomorrow remember what He has done for you. And as you begin this next year, ask yourself this question, “What think ye of Christ?” (Matt 22:42).

Day 11- Mary

Sometimes I think Mary is over looked. There isn’t a lot about her in the scriptures, but what is written we can see how wonderful she was. After the angel told her that she was chosen of the Lord to be Jesus’ mother and how it would happen she simply said, “Behold the handmaid of the Lord; be it unto me according to thy word” (Luke 1:38). Mary was humble and obedient. She endured many trials. Being pregnant she had to ride on a donkey some 90 miles to Bethlehem. She gave birth in a stable with dirty animals. At one point she couldn’t find Jesus for 3 days. As a mother I’m sure she was very worried about him. When she did find him he was teaching in the temple (Luke 2). The last few years of Jesus’ life he spent away from her doing his Father’s will teaching, healing, and showing us how to live. My children are still young and are still living at home. I don’t know how hard it was for her to let him go. And the final thing we know Mary suffered was to see her son killed on the cross for all mankind. I’ve never have lost a child, but some of my close friends have. It must have been hard for her. Mary was a very strong woman and someone I have grown to look up to.

Day 10- The Angel

Have you ever noticed that there is always an angel present on the most important events in Church history? An angel came to Mary to tell her she was going to be the mother of Jesus. Angels sang when he was born. An angel came to the shepherds telling them of Christ’s birth. An angel was there to open the tomb for Jesus’ resurrection. God the Father and Jesus Christ appeared to Joseph Smith. And an angel met with Joseph each year before he could take the plates and translate them into the Book of Mormon.
We still have angels today. We each can be an angel to someone else. We can answer their prayers. We can be their shoulder to cry on. President Kimball said it best when he said, “God does notice us, and he watches over us. But it is usually though another person that he meets our needs” (Small acts of service, Ensign 1974). How can you be an angel to someone this Christmas season?

Day 9- Joseph

When I think of Joseph I think of courage, faith, and devotion. He could have left Mary, who he was espoused to. But he didn’t. I don’t know what it was like in those days. I don’t know if people gossiped like they do now. But I think it took a lot of courage to stand by Mary’s side. I love what Elder Jeffrey R. Holland said about Joseph, “As a father, I have thought often of Joseph—that strong, silent, almost unknown man who must have been more worthy than any other mortal man to be the guiding foster father of the living Son of God. It was Joseph selected from among all men who would teach Jesus to work. It was Joseph who taught him the books of the Law. It was Joseph who, in the seclusion of the shop, helped him begin to understand who he was and ultimately what he was to become.”
As parents do we take the sacred responsibility of raising our children to be the adults that Heavenly Father would want them to become?

Day 8- Wise men #3

The third thing I want to tell you about what I have learned from the wise men comes from what they did after they met Jesus and gave him their gifts. In Matthew 2:12 is reads, “And being warned of God in a dream that they should not return to Herod, they departed into their own country another way.”
The wise men listen to the promptings of the Lord and they went a different way home. Sometimes in our lives the Lord tries to tell us, or warn us, of things pointing us to go in a different direction. It’s not always easy to follow what the Lord tells us to do, but it is always for our good and/or for the good of others around us. Next time you feel a prompting from the Lord, even if it is pointing you in a direction you hadn’t planned on, follow the Lord and all will be well in the end.

Day 7-Wise men #2

The wise men that came to see Jesus brought him gifts, “they presented unto him gifts; gold, and frankincense, and myrrh.” (Matthew 2:11) In December 2009 Wendy Kenney said, “Most scholars agree that the gifts were symbolic. The gold symbolized Jesus’s kingship, frankincense His divinity, and myrrh His suffering and death, since myrrh was a substance used to perfume dead bodies before burial.”
For the past 4 years my husband and I have used the symbolic names of these gifts to give to our children for their Christmas presents. We give them a Frankincense gift, the gift of “meaning”. This gift is usually a homemade gift or scriptures, things that mean something. The gift of Myrrh is the gift of “usefulness”. This gift, like the name, is something useful. I’ve made blankets, given clothes, school supplies, things of that nature. The gift of Gold is usually a toy and to help “Santa” become more part of our ‘Christ celebration’ Santa brings the gift of Gold.

Day 6- Wise men #1

In the scriptures it doesn’t say how many wise men followed the star to find Jesus. There are many songs that speak of the Three Kings, and most Nativities have three wise men in them. So for the next three days I will share with you what I have learned from the story of the wise men.
In Matthew 2:9-11 it says, “…and, lo, the star, which they saw in the east, went before them, till it came and stood over where the young child was. When they saw the star, they rejoiced with exceeding great joy. And when they were come into the house, they saw the young child with Mary his mother, and fell down, and worshipped him: and when they had opened their treasures, they presented unto him gifts; gold, and frankincense, and myrrh.”
In this scripture it doesn’t say that Jesus was a baby. It says that he was a young child. Not only did the wise men see the new star, a sign that they had been watching for, but they diligently followed it until they found Jesus. Their travel must have taken a long time. Are we that diligent in staying close to the Lord and following the signs He gives to us through His prophets?

Day 5- The Shepherds

I love the story of the Shepherds. Being a mother I see what a wonderful gift they were to Mary. When we have babies today we have family and friends who come and share in our joy. Mary and Joseph were alone. I imagine when they showed up to worship the baby and share in their joy of His birth how wonderful that feeling must have been for Mary. She wasn’t alone and the Lord literally showed her that.
Another lesson that I love about the Shepherds is that “they came with haste” as it says in Luke 2:16. They didn’t question what the Angel had told them. They left their flock and ran to see the baby Jesus. Are we that quick to obey when we are told we need to do something, or change, when the Prophets speak? The Shepherds are great examples of obedience.

Day 4- The Donkey

When I think of the Donkey that carried Mary that long way, I can’t help by think of service and love. Mary, in her weakened condition, could not have made the journey walking. She needed help. I’m sure it wasn’t easy carrying the pregnant woman but the donkey did it. It might seem like a small act to some, but for Her I’m sure it was immeasurable. It is the little acts of service and love that matter the most. I hope during this wonderful time of year you can reach out to someone, to serve and to love them.

Day 3- The Star

When the star of Bethlehem is mentioned during the Christmas season it is usually referred to by the prophesy spoken in Helaman 14:5, “And behold, there shall a new star arise, such an one as ye never have beheld; and this also shall be a sign unto you.” The sign spoken in this scripture is the sign that Christ was born. It also mentions in the scriptures that wise men followed the star. Tonight I would like to talk a little bit about what the star means to me.

When I was a Young Woman I remember a lesson we had about how important we were to our Heavenly Father on an individual level. During the lesson we talked about the stars and how many there were. President Uchtdorf in the 2011 October General Conference said, “Astronomers have attempted to count the number of stars in the universe. One group of scientists estimates that the number of stars within range of our telescopes is 10 times greater than all the grains of sand on the world’s beaches and deserts.” That is a lot of stars, and that can be intimidating to think of all that God has created. I love what President Uchtdorf continues with, “while we may look at the vast expanse of the universe and say, “What is man in comparison to the glory of creation?” God Himself said we are the reason He created the universe! His work and glory—the purpose for this magnificent universe—is to save and exalt mankind. In other words, the vast expanse of eternity, the glories and mysteries of infinite space and time are all built for the benefit of ordinary mortals like you and me. Our Heavenly Father created the universe that we might reach our potential as His sons and daughters.” In Doctrine and Covenants 18:10 it reads, “Remember the worth of souls is great in the sight of God.” No matter how many stars are out there God knows each star just as God knows you. He cares for you individually and knows what you are going through. At the end of the Young Women’s lesson we were each given a single ‘glow in the dark’ star. When I got home that day I placed that star on the ceiling right above my head so that each night I would look up at that one star and remember that I matter. That star is still in my old bedroom at my parent’s house. I hope as you look at the Christmas star this year you will see how important you are to our Heavenly Father.

Day 2- The Evergreen Tree

The evergreen tree, to me this represent a few things about the Savior. First, it is always green no matter what time of year. When you see an evergreen tree you know what to expect. The Savior is constant and never failing. He is always there for us no matter the season. Second the needles of the tree point upward reminding us to look to Heaven for guidance. Third its’ roots are deep and can withstand heavy storms in the mountains. We, like the evergreen tree, need to have deep roots with our testimony of the Gospel to withstand the temptations that come at us every day. We bring these trees into our home at Christmas time. We decorate them with lights, with precious ornaments, and we place gifts under it. May we always remember that Christ is the “light of the world” (John 8:12) and has given us the most precious gift of all, the gift of eternal life (D&C 14:7).

Day 1- Manger

For the 12 Days of Christmas this year I want to talk about what each piece of the Nativity can represent. I hope this will bring Christ more into your Holiday season.

Elder Neil L. Anderson in the April 2010 General Conference said, “[Do you] visualize the premortal council, where Jesus – the greatest of all – declared, “Here am I, send me”? Do [you] see [in yourself] a willingness to serve [by] following His example? Do [you] think about His humble birth, the Savior of the world laying in a manger? Do His circumstances help [you] better understand the proper place of material possessions?"

In this time of year where material things are put front and center, take a moment and see where Christ is in your Christmas Celebrations. After all He IS the reason for the Season.

Bucket Overflowing

I feel like my bucket is overflowing with blessings right now. I'm not saying that my life is perfect. I'm not saying that all my days are wonderful, that every moment is filled with joy, or even that my home never has fighting children in it. What I am saying is that even though things are never perfect, and that in spite of the fact that I am not perfect, I have been given so many blessings. Especially this past last week. Blessings that might seem small or even unnoticed to some, but for me they have been huge. My Father in Heaven is aware of me and situation, and I am grateful for Him and His love for me.

The Spirit of Things

If you know me at all, you know that I love to plan a head especially when it comes to Christmas. I send out a family email in July so everyone knows who they have and I can start shopping. I love looking for the perfect gift, and getting it for a good deal. That is one of the reasons why I start early. Then I don't have all the worry about material things and can focus on the true meaning of the season, Christ's birth.
Well this year has been a little different for me. I didn't get the family email sent out until the end of August. It is now November and I only have 4 presents bought and 3 that I'm making are still not finished. There are some people I don't even know what to get them. I've been struggling with everything this year. Then a few weeks ago I really started to dread the upcoming season because I am so behind on everything. All I could think of was I'm not going to be ready.
That all changed yesterday. It was all kind of odd how it happened, but then again sometimes Heavenly Father helps us in ways we don't expect. I didn't feel good and I didn't have a whole lot of energy. I was glad that it was the day my mom takes my kids and gives them singing lessons (they're learning Christmas songs so we can go and sing them to the elderly in rest homes later in December) so I could get some much needed rest. After my kids left I had the thought to run some errands instead of taking a nap. They didn't take me that long and on the way home I decided to stop at my moms to listen and see how my kids were doing. While I was listening and waiting outside the door I noticed a book about Christmas, more specifically a Christ Centered Christmas. I took it and started reading. I loved what I was reading. It brought to my mind all of the things I already do to try and make the season more about Christ and less about Santa. I felt peace. Then I had remembered that I picked up a Nativity that had 12 pieces to it so I could do the 12 days of Christmas to a family in need. While reading the book I had ideas of how to do it, what to say each day with each different piece of the Nativity. There were some suggestions in the book of things you could do as a family to make the season even more special. I can now say that I am excited about the up coming season. I even got out my Thanksgiving decorations today. I was reminded that the spirit of things is much more important than the material things. And even if I'm a little behind I can still get into the true spirit of the season. I am so grateful for that tender mercy from my Heavenly Father. He truly does love us and watches out for us even when we haven't asked Him yet.

Time

I can't believe it's November already, and not just the first, but the 2nd! There have been so many things the last little while that I've wanted to share with you. Then something happens and I forget, or I get caught up in the business of life. Time is something I am struggling with these days. I feel it passes much too quickly. So today I am making the time to write down what I have been grateful for this past week.
I have loved having my husband live back at home with us 24/7. And when you have a week like I did this past week, I am even more grateful. We had a 'bug" go through all of our kids. The yukie throw up kind of a 'bug'. I don't do well with throw up. It usually makes me just as sick as the person who threw up. I was so glad he was home to help me, and then I got sick over the weekend too. I don't know what I would have done if he hadn't have been there. I am blessed. And today I am thankful for a loving husband who lives with us all the time and can handle cleaning up the stuff I can't.

General Conference

This weekend was wonderful! I learned so many things. I felt the spirit. I had prayers answered. I spent time with my family. I got to visit my side and my husband's side of the family. We have an amazing Prophet! I am so thankful I get to live in this day when we have a Prophet of the Lord guiding and directing us!
Go here to learn more
Go here to listen to General Conference

Pitty Party

For the last few months I've been giving myself a pitty party. Don't get me wrong I love my calling in my church. I get to teach the children in my ward who are ages 18 months to 3 years of age. It's fun to play with the toys and try to help them know who our Savior is. Yes it can be very hard and it needs lots of energy. We have 23 children in our nursery (that is what the class is called). Being in nursery I don't get to see very many people who are in my ward. It's a calling that takes you away from the companionship of the other sisters in the ward. When people move in and I go and introduce myself I find that they've been living in the ward for a few months. Then I tell them that I work in the nursery and I'm sorry I didn't notice them before. So in my pitty party for myself I had started to complain about it. How I felt left out of things. How I didn't know when activities were. And how I didn't feel loved or apart of the wonderful organization of Relief Society anymore.
So when it was the annual General Relief Society Meeting this past weekend I was less than excited about it. I really didn't want to go, let a lone listen to the speakers. I had a bad attitude, and it was all my fault. My mom called me at the last minute telling me what channel it was on t.v. So I decided I probably should just watch it. I started watching with a bitter heart, something that I was even surprised at. I love General Conference! It is an amazing time and opportunity we get to hear what the Lord would want us to hear through his prophets. I've had countless prayers answered by listening to their words and then studying them later when they come into print. My heart finally started to open so by the time President Uchtdorf spoke I was ready to really listen to what he had to say. His talk was just for me. He talked about the 'forget me not' flower and how it was his favorite flower growing up. He listed 5 things we needed to remember when ever we saw this flower;
Forget not to be patient with yourself;
Forget not the difference between a good sacrifice and a foolish sacrifice;
Forget not to be happy now;
Forget not the "why" of the gospel;
Forget not that the Lord loves you.
We went into more detail with each of these 'forget me nots'. It was the most beautiful talk. I learned so much from it. My heart was softened. I was humbled. I was once again reminded that Heavenly Father loves me and has not forgotten about me. What a blessing it is to hear His words through His prophets here on earth. Now I am happily waiting until this coming weekend when I will have the opportunity to listen to the rest of General Conference.
If you would like to watch his talk go here.
If you would like to read highlights of his talk go here.

Blessed

This past week has been another hard week. Besides my little trip to the ER (almost 2 weeks ago now) I was feeling really good. Not many nights with pain. Well this week has been a different story. Since Sunday night, when I up until 3am with pain, I've had lots of pain every night this week. Usually when I'm up with a lot of pain I tend to struggle the next day as well. So when I have several nights in a row with pain I'm usually not able to do my normal day to day tasks. That has been a different story as well this week. Two days, so far this week, my sister has needed help with her son because she was called into work. I felt just fine when she called and asked for help. I was able to watch him and we even went to the park one day. On another day, one of my friends that lives near by wanted to help her neighbor who has been sick. The only way she could do service for her neighbor was if I watched her children. Again I felt really good when she called so I was able to help her help her neighbor. Looking back it was amazing, a true blessing and tender mercy from the Lord. I was able to feel good during the times of those days that others called for my help and I could help them who needed it. I struggle with the concept of being labeled as a person with "poor health". Though I do have poor health, that is not who I am. It doesn't define me. I've had a hard time with people asking me about my health lately. I don't want people to think of me that way. The Lord knows that I've been struggling with that lately. So this week when it really was a bad week for my health and I was struggling, I didn't have to tell anyone about it. I was able to say 'yes' when others needed my help. To help others is such a blessing. A blessing I have wanted and needed to be able to give to others. That in and of itself is an amazing tender mercy sent to me from my loving Heavenly Father.

Lost

I coach my oldest son's soccer team. Last night we had a game. During the games my husband helps me coach the team on two fields. My other two children watch from the sidelines. Last night my mom came with one of my nieces to watch. Towards the end of the game my daughter and niece took my youngest son to get a drink of water. When the game ended we couldn't find my son. My daughter and niece forgot him at the drinking fountain. The place where they have the games is a gigantic complex. Just to get to the field we played on we had to walk for almost 5 minutes. There are always tons of games going on with a lot of people everywhere. So when they didn't know where he was I got scared. Of all the places to get lost, this was almost as bad as a mall. We ran and searched and searched. Panic set in and then I remembered to say a silent prayer for us to find him and for him to be okay. I don't remember how long it took us to find him and my husband was the one to find him. He was standing behind a mini van in the parking lot. Relief came but I was still a little scared. I have never lost a child like this before. Then the 'what ifs' started to set in. What if someone hadn't seen him and they backed up their car? and so on. Then I remember that I said a little prayer and the Lord heard it. Everything was okay and I didn't need to think about the what ifs because he was safe. My other two children were still so scared they cried most of the way home and wanted to sleep with him last night. So all three children slept in the same room while my husband and I were able to sleep peacefully in our room. How grateful I am that the Lord kept him safe, answered my prayer and we were able to find him. My three children are three of my most wonderful blessings in this life. And I am so lucky that I have all three of them still here with me.

Embarrassed

I wasn't going to mention this to anyone. It was a little embarrassing, but I was blessed, so I'll share my experience.
Last Friday night was 'girls night out' with some friends of mine. So my husband decided to take our three children camping. My oldest didn't want to leave me so he stayed and was going to go to the baby sitters. Just as my husband was leaving I got a phone call saying that girls night was canceled. My first thought was, 'maybe I should go camping with my family?' But I really didn't feel good about it. So the three of them left and my oldest and I went out for a date. We got home a little after 7 and ate dinner. We were then going to pop some popcorn and watch a movie. Every time I eat I have to take digestive enzymes to help digest my food. If I don't I have tons of pain. My whole life I have been able to swallow a lot of pills at the same time. Once I had a friend dare me to see just how many I could get down. I finally did it with 20 pills in one swallow with no problem. So when I needed to swallow 8 or 10 after eating Friday night I didn't even think twice about it. Well for the first time in my life they got stuck. I could feel them with my hand on my neck. It hurt so bad. I took a few sips of water, it moved the pills a little and made things worse. Now I couldn't breathe very well and my body started dry heaving trying to get them out of my throat. I called my dad and he and my mom were at my house it less than 5 minutes. They called my brother. He came and they gave me a blessing. Then my dad rushed me to the ER while my mom stayed with my oldest.
They saw me right away as I continued to dry heave. They gave me some water to sip and I started to throw up the water. Still nothing from dinner that I just got done eating. The hospital we went to didn't have the right equipment for the tests they needed to do. So I was sent to another hospital. It took them an hour to finally see me, the whole time I was still dry heaving but it had slowed down a little. I was so tired by this time. Finally I was sent to radiology where they gave me some really nasty liquid to drink while they took extremely fast x-rays while I swallowed to see if the pills were still stuck. They came back clear with a little swelling in my throat. I threw up the nasty liquid and continued to dry heave. So they gave me what they called a 'GI cocktail' to help calm my body down and numb my throat. After 30 minutes I stopped dry heaving and was able to go home. If I was still having a large amount of pain I was supposed to return to the hospital in the morning for more testing to see what and or if any damage occurred in my throat.
I swallowed my pills around 7:45pm and returned home at 11:30pm. After dry heaving for a little over 2 hours I was extremely tired.
I set my alarm for 8:30am to see how bad the pain was. It hurt to talk and swallow but I was just so tired I couldn't make myself go back to the hospital. I went back to bed and my dad came and woke me up around 11am. All day Saturday all I could handle was liquid. Sunday night I had my 1st solid food, mashed potatoes and over cooked noodles.
Today my throat doesn't hurt to eat. I can only swallow 1 pill at a time and I'm drinking some stuff to help the healing process along.
Only a handful of people know about this story, until now. It really is embarrassing to even think about how it happened. And then it was embarrassing to dry heave in front of so many people. But I need to share this with you because of the many blessing that I received. It would have been so much worse if I was out with my friends when this happened. Only the Lord knows what would have happened if I was up in the mountains when I took my pills. I was blessed to be able to stay home, have my parents and brother live so close, to have a priesthood blessing, have the first hospital see me so quickly, and have everything turn out okay. Once again I was preserved by the Lord and I am so thankful for the tender mercies he continues to send me.

One last trip

A few weeks ago my husband's brother called and asked us if we wanted to meet him and his family at a cabin for the weekend. It was this past weekend, the last weekend before school started. One last trip of famiy fun before we got back to the grind of it all. So of course we said yes. We don't get to see this brother very much because he lives so far away. So any time we get a chance to see them we try and jump on the opportunity. While I was packing I said a little extra prayer that I wouldn't forget anything important. I always say my prayers and we always say a prayer before we leave on a trip, but this was a different prayer. I don't think that I've ever said one like that before, and to be honest it really didn't phase me until we were on our way. It was a great weekend! We had so much fun!! We were safe, we were protected, and I forgot more things on this trip than I care to count. I've never forgotten that many things before, but I didn't forget anything that was important, that I would need. For example, we all needed a bathroom break on the drive down, it was a 3.5 hour drive. So we stopped at a gas station. Before we started on the road again I went to the back of the car to get some snacks put for my kids to eat to hold them over until we got there for dinner. Then we started on the road again. The stretch of road we were on was a little bumpy and the speed limit was 80 miles per hour. After we had driven about 5 minutes it hit me, "Where is my wallet?" I had taken it in the gas station with me. I didn't want to leave it in the car. I looked all over panicking, and then the thought came, "You left it on the bumper when you got the snacks out." My husband pulled over as quickly as he could. I got out and ran to the back of the car. I almost started crying, it was there. My little wallet hadn't fallen of the bumper of our car! It was a little miracle. It was an answer to my prayer. My wallet had a lot of important things in it. If I had lost it I don't think we could have gone to the cabin and had the fun we did and made the memories we did. Our Heavenly Father does care about us, even the things that might not seem to matter when you look at the eternal scheme of things, he still cares. He does listen. He does answer.

Taken Care Of

Every summer I buy my kids summer movie passes. They see 1 movie a week though out the summer. It's usually an older children's movie, but it's still fun to go. Yesterday was the last movie for the summer. We were planning on going but then I didn't feel very well at the last minute. I called my sister-in-law, who goes with us, and told her not to expects us. She volunteered to come and get my three littles. I was so grateful for that, blessing #1, because I was able to take a nap and felt much better afterwords. When my children got home my sister-in-law told me what happened when they were driving to the movie. She was going to go through the intersection when the light turned green but hesitated, something she says she never does. Then just before she started to drive a car ran the red light going the other direction going extremely fast. The other car would have t-boned them and who knows what could have happened to my children, blessing #2.
Then today was really crazy. Yesterday before my sister-in-law said she would come and get my kids, I had told myself that I would just make it up to my kids and take them to the movie today. I had no idea that today was going to be three times more busy than planned, blessing #3, and I wouldn't have been able to keep my promise to them. I love it when I can look back and see that the Lord is always taking care of me and my family. I just need to remember to look back and truly "See".

Blessings through Sickness

For the past two years I've done a Kids Kamp for my children and others. It's a lot of work, and also a lot of fun. This year it was scheduled for the 1st week in August. We had our first day on Monday the 1st. Then when we got home that day, two of my three kids were sick with a very contagious virus. I called all of the parents and they were all very understanding about postponing the kamp until the following week. I thought it was going to be a big burden. I had no idea what a blessing it was until that week continued. Besides the bad weather that would have made some of the activities impossible to do, I got really sick. Not the sick like my kids were, but my health sick that I've been struggling with now for the past 3.5 years. I haven't had a week like that in a long time. Looking back there wouldn't have been any way possible that I could have completed the kamp. I was so weak and ill. It was a tender mercy for me that my children caught the virus. A virus that they had been exposed to a week earlier that usually manifests in just a couple of days after being exposed. The Lord knew what my body was going to do and He knew that I wouldn't have canceled the kamp unless there was an extremely good reason to. Not only am I thankful for that tender mercy, but I am so thankful for a Father in Heaven that knows me better than anyone.

Two Parents

It's been two weeks since my husband moved back home with us. Every time I think about how it worked out with this new job of his I can't help but feel gratitude, peace, and the sense that this is what Heavenly Father had planned all along. There were many many things that I learned over that trial, some I shared with you. But the thing that is standing out to me tonight is how much my children need two parents. When my husband comes home from work he reads to the kids while I finish dinner. Or he takes our oldest boy out to play catch. Little things like that, that I haven't been able to do much of or not even at all because of the duties that I had to do all on my own. I have a deep appreciation for those women who, for one reason or another, don't have a husband to help them. I understand on a different level why parenting is so important both for the husband and the wife. I am grateful for that new understanding and Tender Mercie.

Courage

For the last few months I've been studying, reading, and thinking a lot about Nephi. He is a prophet in The Book of Mormon. This past Sunday one of the speakers in sacrament meeting talked on Faith. In her talk she mentioned Nephi and the Faith he had. If you're not familiar with his story I'll do a short summary, go here if you want to read more.
Nephi's father, Lehi, was also a prophet. They lived in a wicked city and Lehi preached repentance. In a dream the Lord told Lehi to take his family into the wilderness because the people were going to kill him and the Lord was going to destroy the city. After they had traveled many days the Lord commanded Lehi to have his sons return to the city to get the Gold Plates (Scriptures). They went. The two older brothers didn't like their father and lacked faith, unlike Nephi who had a lot of faith. They tried two times to get the plates and failed. Nephi didn't want to return to the wilderness unless they got what the Lord had told them to get. The two older brothers beat him up. An angel came and stopped them. Nephi returned to the city alone and the Lord delivered the plates to him. The story goes on and there are many many more lessons to learn from Nephi.
As the speaker was talking in church my mind started to drift to Nephi and what he must have gone through. On this earth we are here for only a short time. When you think about that time, you are here with your siblings the most. Your parents lived before you were born and will die before you. Just like your children will live longer than you. But your siblings will be with you for the longest time. Those relationships should be important to you because of that. I love my brothers and sister and their spouses. We get along really well and love to do things together. I love my husband's brothers and sisters and their spouses. We have so much fun together. When thinking about Nephi and what he endured with his siblings I can't help but admire the courage he had. He knew he needed to do what the Lord asked him to do. But every time he tried to do what was right, his two older brothers tried to stop him, sometimes by beating him up and once tied him up for days. Thinking about my relationship with my family, that would be extremely hard to do. Nephi had true courage. He did the things the Lord asked him to do even under the most difficult of circumstances. I need to try and be more like Nephi.

Busy, Busy, Busy

Wow, so much has happened to both my family and I over the last month. Remember when it was "raining and pouring, and then the lightening and thunder came"? Well after I was able to repent and listen to the Lord I started to feel peace, mostly about my husband's job situation. We really didn't have any new prospects at the time but there was so much peace in our home. Both my husband and I knew that this was the Lord's plan the whole time. Back in November when things really started to get hard (being apart all of the time), we fasted and prayed about what to do. The first answer I received was, "You prayed about accepting the job, but you never prayed about moving there." It was a really strange answer to get. So we started praying about when to move. We really didn't get an answer and decided to act in faith. I took a trip down to where my husband works. We spent two days looking at apartments to rent. We found two that we really liked. When I got back home we had decided to rent out our house, move and rent one of these apartments. After we made those decisions everything started to fall apart. Nothing worked out, so we stayed here through the holidays thinking we were going to be able to move sometime at the beginning of this year. Then all of the lightening and thunder came (the flood and the mold trial/disaster). What a blessing that we were here and not renting to someone else when all of that happened.
Now on to even better news and blessings. My husband found a new job. It is the perfect job for him. It was like he was made for it. After he was interview for the position the employer even told him that she wasn't going to interview anyone else until he told her what he was going to do. This job is exactly what he wants to be doing, it's only 25 minutes away instead of 2.5 hours, so that means he will be moving back home with us. Next week is his last week at his current job. The last week he will be away from us. Then he starts his new job the week after that. The timing couldn't have been more perfect. I was told once in a blessing that I would be able to look back over my life and see how the Lord had guided me. I can see that now in this situation with my family. The Lord was in charge the whole time and we have been blessed because we have tried to do His will and work on His time line. It hasn't been easy, I've posted about that :], but it has been worth it. I am so thankful for an eternal Father who constantly watches out for me and my family.

Acceptance

Two weeks ago today, I attended a Relief Society meeting. Relief Society is a woman's organization in my church. Go here to learn more. To be honest I don't remember everything that was said, only bits and pieces. But what I do remember changed my whole outlook on my life right now. For a long time now I have been living in the past. By that I mean I would see old pictures of myself and see home movies of my self and I was longing for the way I used to be. It was killing me to see how fun I was, how much energy I had, what a good mom I was to my children. Then questions would follow such as, why can't I be that person again, how come I can't have that kind of energy to play with my kids? I was really struggling. I almost didn't go to the meeting. But then my husband surprised me and came home early for the weekend. He told me to go so he could have some alone time with our kids. After the meeting I knew all of it was an answer to my prayer.
During the meeting one women in my ward spoke about the stages of grief; Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, and Acceptance. I've heard the stages before but what I didn't understand was how to apply them to my life. She explained, first off that the stages are not just step one, then you move on to step two, and so on. You can go back and forth from stage to stage depending on the day. Then she described how the stages apply in our life for more than just grief. She drew a picture of a house on the white board and talked about our lives. When you look back at your life you can see certain dates or moments in your life that make it change. For example when you get married, or graduated from High School or College, or when someone you know dies or is in an accident. Those moments make a line in our path. As She spoke she drew a vertical line representing those moments, then drew a bunch of squiggly lines after it. She explained that after that moment or moments in your lives (the vertical line) you go around and around through the stages of grief (the squiggly lines). It might be that you are in denial for a long time and then angry for a short while but then you go back and forth between bargaining and depression. It isn't always a straight line to acceptance, and it might take a while to get there. Then she went on to talk about acceptance. She said some powerful things. Being able to truly be at the stage of acceptance you have to realize that you're not back at the normal you used to be before the moment hit your path and a vertical line was drawn. You have to realize that you're at the "new normal".
The whole time she was talking I pictured my life, the moments where there were big changes in it. And of course I looked back on one of the biggest moments, the moment I was in the hospital with pancreatitus and gallstones. I remembered sitting there in my hospital room crying to my husband, asking him, what does God want me to learn from this? I was in panic mode. I could feel that this trial was going to be long and hard. I was past the denial and anger stage and I was already at bargaining. Then over the past 3 and a half years I saw how I have gone back and forth through the stages of grief. I began to truly understand what she was talking about, but it wasn't until after she talked about the 'new normal' that I realized that I needed to change my outlook on my current life. I was never going to be that same person I was. I've been through a lot both physically and mentally. But I could still be a good mom and have a good life, just a different one, and new normal. It was one of those 'Ah ha' moments like Oprah describes. :] I left the meeting feeling so uplifted and closer to my Father in Heaven. He wanted me to move on and I needed to move on. The last two weeks have been so much different for me. I am more at peace than I've been in a long time. I'm happier with myself. I have more energy and have even started working out again. Something I used to do all of the time. In short I've made a lot of changes. I've accepted that this is how I am now. I can still find answers to better my health, I haven't given up. But I can accept that I'll never eat a hamburger from Wendy's again. :] My life is different, but it is still a good life and I owe that to my Heavenly Father.

Family Home Evening

In my church they encourage families to set aside a night each week to hold Family Home Evening, usually Monday nights. It's a time where you can be together as a family to learn and teach principles of the gospel. Either my husband or I have always taught the lesson. Our children rotate leading the song, saying the prayers, choosing an activity, and choosing a treat afterwards. Well yesterday during the day I noticed my oldest son, who is 7, was reading his scriptures on scripturesforkids.com. I had the thought to have him give the lesson for Family Night. I told him he needed to start thinking about it. As time got closer I asked him what he was going to have the lesson on. He suggested a couple of things, then I suggested one thing. He didn't agree and he choose to have it on Prophets. To help him I printed off a little page about what a prophet is and then a page talking about our current prophet President Thomas S. Monson.
After the opening prayer he just took over teaching. He first asked my other two children, "What is a prophet?" He called on his sister who replied "they go up to Heaven to talk to God to see what he wants us to know. Then he comes back to earth and tells us what God told him." She almost had it right, all but the actually going up to heaven part. I was taken back and amazed at how well he had taken over, and what a good teacher he is already. I couple of times during the lesson I tried to help guide him. Then he would say, "But mom I have something else to ask." Then he would ask questions such as, "Can you name some of the prophets?" To which my children named a couple past prophets. Or "Who was the first prophet?" Great questions. Then at the end of the lesson I explain to him that he needed to bare his testimony. He wasn't sure he knew how. I told him to tell his siblings what he felt in his heart about the things he taught in his lesson. This is what he said all on his own without my help, "I'd like to bare my testimony that I know this church is true. I know that we have a prophet and that he tells us what God wants us to know. In the name of Jesus Christ Amen."
I was so proud of him. I was unsure about the whole thing. I didn't know if he was old enough to teach a lesson. He proved me wrong. It was a wonderful experience for me to be apart of. I am a lucky mother of some amazing children.

Mothers

This weekend my husband took me to visit one of my Grandmother's grave. She died suddenly 9 years ago. It was really hard for me. I know that I'll see her again. The Savior made that possible. I can still miss her and know that truth. She was an amazing woman. I was lucky to attend a college in the town where she lived. Every Friday or sometime during the week, I would go visit her. She would talk to me, feed me sometimes, loved me always, and then kicked me out so I could go have a social life while she finished my laundry. :] We were close when I was younger too. I didn't have any girl cousins my age on that side of the family. There were 4 boys older than me that I always tried to hang out with. When they wouldn't let me, she was there to pick up the pieces and then we would do something together. It is because of her that I love playing games so much. Every week up until she died, she was apart of a group that would get together each week to play games. I always thought that was so cool. :] There are many more wonderful things I could tell you about my Grandma that made her so special to me. The reason for this post is because of that visit and it being Mother's Day I have been thinking about my family. More specifically the women in family, both past and present. There have been and continue to be wonderful examples of faithful women who accomplished many things that surround me. I was fortunate to know both sets of my Great Grandparents on my mother's side of the family and one set of Great Grandparents on my father's side. One of my Great Grandmother's survived the great depression being a milliner, making hats. She was very frugal until the day she passed away at the age of 97, also 9 years ago. I am so blessed to come from the family that I do. I am who I am because of these amazing women and the example that they have set for me. I look forward to the day when we will all get to see each other again. I am and will be eternally grateful for the Savior's atonement that makes that reunion possible.

Money

I know it's a hard thing to admit or to even talk about. But money in tight, especially in these times for a lot of people. For our family it is no different. Then it hit me the other day how blessed my family has been. For the past two years when something huge has happened that needed a lot more money than we had to spare, it happened right around tax season. Last year our transmission blew up and had to be built from scratch. Our refund covered the cost almost exactly. This year, as you have read, we had a flood and then the mold. The flood was covered by insurance but the mold stuff wasn't. What a blessing that this happened when it did. We don't know how much it will all be yet. But I know that we'll have money to cover it because of our tax refund coming in. It amazes me how much our Heavenly Father cares for us, even when it come to our finances.

Progress

I'm staying at my parent's house again tonight. I was able to sleep three nights in my own bed and it was wonderful! Things are progressing on our house. The toilets are out so they can put the flooring in the bathrooms in the morning. Tomorrow night they'll be put back in. Then next week the rest of the flooring should be installed.
A couple of weeks ago my husband and I attended the Temple together, something we haven't been able to do yet this year. It was wonderful! I gained some much needed perspective. Something I had lost is the craziness of our home falling apart. Really in the eternal aspect of things, this truly will be "but a small moment" in my eternal journey. Ever since then I have been able to just go with it. Things happen, some good and some bad, and sometimes they are even hard to deal with. But the most important things are the blessings and the help that come. This blessing of perspective was important. I am more relaxed. I am enjoying the little moments with my children each day. I'm trying to just let things happen and not control them when I can't anyways. I have had more peace because of that and I am truly grateful for that tender mercy from my Father in Heaven.

When it rains, it pours...

...and then sometimes lightening and thunder comes. So my last post I told you about the disaster that happened in our home, little did I know that that was just the beginning. One detail I didn't tell you about when we stayed at the hotel, our hotel room flooded. We joked about it using the saying when it rains (our house flooding) it pours (our hotel room flooding). It really wasn't that bad just our clothes got wet. After we got back from the hotel we looked at what money we had been given from our insurance to replace carpet and bathroom flooring. We decided to put a wood floor in down stairs instead of putting carpet back down. We also decided to knock a wall out that separated the kitchen and the living room to make a great room. With these changes, willing and dealing, and added some of our own money we figured we could replace all of the flooring in all of the bathrooms in our home. Another blessing. Now I'll tell you about the thunder and the lightening that have come since then. March 21st the doctor I've been working with since my surgery called and told me he didn't have any more answers for me. I had been in a lot of pain trying a new medication that wasn't working, and he wanted to send me to another doctor. I have now been through 4 or 5 doctors that have said the same thing to me, no answers. Then on the 22nd we were told that my husbands job was going to end. They were closing the ranch he works at. I cried myself to sleep that night. Then Friday the 25th of March we started ripping up the floors in our other two bathrooms in our home. We found water under the floor and what looked and smelled like mold. We turned off our furnace and moved to my parents house. Since it was the weekend we couldn't do anything until Monday. Over the next week we had experts come and test taken. We finally got the results back last Saturday and it is black mold. They are, as I am writing this post, cleaning up the mold. It is not an easy clean up. They have to use all kinds of chemicals, negative air pressure, containment stuff, and they have to rip out almost everything. This has been extremely hard and I'm embarrassed to say that I wasn't handling it very well. I got bitter and even a little mad. People that I talked to probably could tell and I am so sorry for that. Sunday was our church's General Conference. It is where our Prophet and other General Authorities give us council from the Lord. There were so many talks that were very meaningful to me. One reminded me that no one is free from trial and the thing that is most important in the end is how we handle ourselves during our trials. That was a big wake up call to me. I was humbled and felt the spirit talk to my soul. I have been so much better these past two days. My heart is lighter and I am now beginning to see the blessings that have come through this experience. I also learned, or was reminded, that Heavenly Father loves me and lets things happen to me so that I can be tried and tested. They are to help me be better, to become better. I have not been a very good example through this and I am going to change that. I really think that in the end after everything is cleaned up, replaced, and put back together our home will be better and our family will be stronger. I'm sure we will still try and sell our home, even if my husband is loosing his job. We have always been taken care of and I know that we will be in this case too. My biggest prayer has been answered, our family will be back together. It wasn't answered how I thought it was going to be our should be. It was answered the way that my Heavenly Father intended it to be. If you would like to hear more about General Conference click here.

Disaster

*I started writing this back on the 18th and never posted it, maybe you'll understand when you read it. :]

A couple of posts ago I mentioned that things were a little crazy at my house and my family was staying at a hotel. Well here is what happened. Last Tuesday, the 8th, we had a little bit of a flood in our basement. When we had the water disaster people come out to assess the damage the next day, we found out it was sewage water that had leaked from our main floor drain by our furnace. It was more than just a little water. They had to come in and rip up most of the flooring down stairs, take a sample of the drywall, spray antimicrobial stuff to kill anything that might still be hanging around and then have special fans blowing for 4 days. When we got the tests back from the sample of the drywall everything was okay but a lot of the drywall had to be replaced. So after all of the special clean up was over they needed to remove our furnace to rip out some of the damaged drywall. While moving the furnace they broke it and it started leaking carbon monoxide. So while we waited for a new furnace and tried to get our insurance to pay for it, we stayed at a hotel because we didn't have heat in our home. Today they put in our newer furnace. The heat turned on at 4pm. There is still a lot of work that needs to be done. My brother and his family, they live down stairs, are still at the hotel for a couple of days. Looking back at this I have had so many blessings! The biggest one is that when the flood happened my husband was gone to work and it was his on-call week, so he didn't come home last weekend. Believe me it was hard having this mess and him no being here. But this week was much harder and because he was on-call last week he was able to be here with us until this morning when he went back. We got to swim at the hotel a few times with him. Lots of fun bonding time our children needed. Being at the hotel was hard. The only other time we've stayed at a hotel was when we were on vacation. So we thought we were, but we weren't, and I had to keep reminding myself of that. We still had to go to bed early, which didn't happen, so my oldest son could get up early and go to school. We still had errands to run, and we had to get going on choosing new carpet and flooring. If my husband hadn't have been here this week it would have been so much harder for me. He was able to take our son to school in the morning so I could stay with our other two children and let them sleep. I would have had to get them all up to take him. Today was the biggest blessing. We had a lot of stuff at the hotel. Everything from food, a crockpot, to tons of clothes, coloring books, and homework. We had to have everything packed up and checked out so we could be back at our house to let the furnace guys in at 10 am. I couldn't have done that without my husbands help. Another huge blesses was the furnace itself. Our insurance said they wouldn't pay for a new one. We don't have an extra 3 to 5 thousand dollars laying around to pay for a new one. My brother, who is a contractor, was able to pull a favor for a friend and he got us a furnace for not even a fraction of the cost that's only a couple of years old. With the insurance money we will be able to put new carpet in and new flooring in the bathroom. All of those things will look so much nicer and maybe we will be able to sell our home now. This disaster really has been a blessing in disguise and I have been carried by my Heavenly Father so far. He knows what is past, present, future, what is best for our family, and how to answer our prayers.

A leprechaun Prayer

This was too cute not to share with you. This is part of my oldest son's prayer tonight, "...bless thoughts to be put in the leprechaun's heads so they can go to Japan and give each person a gold coin so they can have help..."

Christ-like

Things have been more than just a little crazy around my house lately, more on that later. Tonight I watched my son do so many kind and unselfish things. We've been staying at a hotel just a minute from our home, again more on that later. We decided to go out as a family with my brother's family who also lives in our home and is now living in the hotel with us. They have a son just a little younger than my oldest. They have always been really good friends and at the same time close like brothers. So that means that they fight too. Well tonight there wasn't any fighting. We went to Pirate Island, a pizza place like Chuck-e-Cheese. My oldest noticed that his cousin didn't have any tokens to play the games with. I watched as he handed him half of what he had. You might not think that this was a big deal, but every year for the past 4 years my oldest asks to go to Chuck-e-Cheese for his birthday. It is his favorite place to go and we usually only go on his birthday. When he found out that Pirate Island is like Chuck-e-Cheese he has wanted to go for over a year now. His next kind act was giving his cousin some of his tickets so he could pick out a prize, not having very many of his own. His cousin was so excited to be able to get some prizes too. When we went back to the hotel my oldest noticed that he didn't have as many prizes as his siblings. He got a little upset about it. I took him in the other room and told him about his choices. I got very emotional reminding him of his kindness. As I was reminding him of that I had a precious thought come to my mind. That those acts of kindness that my son had done was exactly what the Savior would have done if He were there tonight. I told my son that as I cried and told him how proud I was of him and the righteous choices he had made. He looked me in the eye, stopped crying, gave me a hug and asked if he could go and see his cousin. When he came back I asked him what he did. He told me he had given him another one of his prizes. It's amazing what we can learn from our children.

Good Things to Come

***You'll need to turn off the music on the side. :]

I loved Elder Holland's words at the end of this message, "don't you quit, you keep trying, there is help and happiness a head. Some blessings come soon, some blessings come late.... It will be alright in the end. Trust in God, and believe in Good things to come."

Miracle

I know it's been a while. Actually there were two separate times I should have posted, but I didn't and now I can't remember what the tender mercies were. I don't like that one bit. I don't want the Lord to think I'm not thankful. Remembering is so important!
Today I want to share with you a little miracle that happened in our family. Sunday night my oldest son woke up to go to the bathroom. He then came and told us the toilet was over flowing. I asked him if it was all over the floor. He said, "no it's just going into the trash." I didn't understand. My husband went to check on it and didn't see anything so we both just fell back asleep. When I woke up the next morning, after my husband- I love sleeping in-, he told me how the back of the toilet the tank (the part that holds the water) had a crack in it. It was leaking all night long. Who knows how that part of the toilet gets a crack? I would understand if it was the toilet seat or even the bowl. Our kids tend to slam the toilet seat down pretty hard after going to the bathroom. But no one ever touches the back part. After looking at the crack, my husband told me the miracles that we received. First it was a miracle that our trash can was under the toilet and not where it usually is, and there wasn't any trash in it. Second, is that the trash can didn't overflow at all with water. The leak was only dripping a little at a time, crazy for how big the crack was. Yes we do have to buy a new toilet, something I wish we didn't have to do. But we don't have to replace the entire bathroom. The water was contained. It didn't leak onto the floor and into the basement. Still sitting here thinking about it, it is just crazy that there wasn't any more damage. It was a miracle. A tender mercy. A wonderful blessing to our family from the Lord!

Selfish

Yesterday and today I have felt so selfish. My husband has five brothers. One of his brothers lost his job the week before Christmas. It's been hard on their family. But they've seen it as a blessing because now he is going to open up his own business. That is amazing to me that they are seeing it as a blessing and not dwelling on the loss. On Saturday we were told that another one of my husbands brothers also lost his job. They are not sure what they are going to do. We had a family fast yesterday for both families. It was a blessing to be able to fast together, and a blessing for me in another way. It helped to me to view our situation a little differently. Yes it's hard to be separated during the weeks. Yes it's been frustrating when things happen at home when I have to deal with them without my husband being there. But he does have a job. That is a huge blessing. We have a roof over our heads. We have warm clothes for our children. We have food on our table. We are blessed! There is a reason that our family is still going through this trial. I need to stop being selfish and start trusting in the Lord more.

Surprise

Last night, Thursday, I didn't get to talk to my husband. He was busy at work. So I went to bed. He called me a little after 11 p.m. saying he was sorry. He had to take care of a few things so he could come home sooner tomorrow. Even though I was half listening and half asleep I was happy because I assumed that meant he would be home about 1 pm. He has staff meetings every Friday morning that are mandatory.
I don't remember hearing anything, not even the door open. I just sensed something so I opened my eyes and saw a tall black figure walking around in my room. I jumped and screamed a little. It was my husband. He had finished all of his work that he had for today and left as soon as he was finished. His boss had told him yesterday afternoon that there wasn't going to be a staff meeting, so he asked if he could do some work from home. I wasn't mad that he had scared me half out of my bed. I was so glad to see him, even at 2 in the morning! He joked telling me that it was tomorrow. What a wonderful surprise and just what I needed. A tender mercy from my Heavenly Father.

Hard Times

Today has been a hard day. I miss my husband more than I can put into words. I haven't been feeling well, and my kids have been sick. Sounds depressing doesn't it? Well I'm telling you because it's times like these that I have to try to see the blessings in my life. So that is what I started to do this afternoon. I am blessed. I have three beautiful children, who are healthy (most of the time). My husband does have a job. We have food on the table and we can pay our bills. Then after listing some of these basic, and important, blessings I have in my life, were some of my prayers answered.
I was reminded that Heavenly Father is in or lives more than we know. Sometimes we have bad days and sometimes we have good days. If we didn't have bad days then we wouldn't know the difference when a good day came along.

They do listen when we teach

I just finished listening to my oldest son's (7 years old) prayer. My favorite part was this, "...and I love you. And tell Jesus I love him too..." I love how innocent, pure, and that just by listening to that little part of his prayer I know he is learning the gospel.

Looking Back

As many of you know my husband works 2 and 1/2 hours away so he is gone during the week and home most weekends. The week before last he was 'on call' and had to stay down to work for 8 days in a row. Those are always the hardest weeks for me. Then last week, the week following his 'on call' week, he gets to be home for 3 days. He still works at his other job, but he is home at night. We get to have family dinner and life seems normal again. Then the next week comes, this week, and he is gone again for the week. These are the hardest times for me. They are inconsistent and emotionally draining. Sometimes I get a little down when he has to go back after being home for a few days in a row. I miss him so much! I have to stop, think, regroup, and make my self look back and see all of the little blessings and tender mercies that I was given during the hard weeks. I really am so blessed! I know that I wouldn't have been able to make it this long in this trial without the help of my Father in Heaven. So why is it that sometimes I still have a hard time remembering that I'm not alone?
I was thinking about this very question last night when I found this quote by Elder Richard G. Scott, "The world is like a jungle, with dangers that can harm or mutilate your body, enslave or destroy your mind, or decimate your morality. It was intended that life be a challenge, not so that you would fail, but that you might succeed though overcoming. You face on every hand difficult but vitally important decisions. There is an array of temptations, destructive influences, and camouflaged dangers, the like of which no previous generation has faced. I am persuaded that today no one, no matter how gifted, strong, or intelligent, will avoid serious problems without seeking the help of the Lord...Trust in the Lord. He knows what He is doing. He already knows your problems. And He is waiting for you to ask for help" Emphasis added.
That quote gave me comfort last night and today I am feeling much better. I need to succeed and I can with the help of the Lord. Times are hard. I need to remember to look back and see the hand of the Lord in my life. To see His tender mercies and blessings. I am a work in progress and probably will be until the day I die, just as long as I keep going and try to overcome.

Stake Conference

Today we had Stake Conference. Stakes are made up of wards. At stake conference all of the wards get together for meetings. This Stake Conference was different than others. It only happens every 10 years. We had a new Stake President called. My bishop is his first counselor. So next week we'll get a new bishop in our ward. Lots of changes, but good changes.
Today I wanted to share with you a little about what Elder Duncan talked about. He is in the presidency of the first quorum of the 70.
He talked a little about the Temple and how we should make our lives like the temple. He recently had the opportunity to go into places in the Salt Lake temple that not many people get to see. He talked about a stair case. On this stair case was the most beautiful banister. It was hand carved by one of the pioneers that helped to build the temple. The detail was exquisite and breath taking. He said he thought it was interesting that such care was taken on something that was not going to be seen by very many people. He likened that to our lives asking us these types of questions, "How are the deepest parts of you? The parts that only God sees? Have you taken the care to make them beautiful?" It made me think about how I live my life when no one is looking. Do I make the right choices? Am I doing the things I need to be doing to keep my testimony strong?
He went on to talk about Doctrine and Covenants section 109. This section is the recording of the dedicatory prayer given at the Kirtland Temple dedication. He suggested that while we read some of the verses to replace the word 'house' with 'lives' or 'life'. It made the scriptures change so much. Tonight I went and read them for myself replacing the words like he had suggested. I would like to share with you some of the verses from that section.

Verses 8 and 9 "Organize yourselves; prepare every needful thing, and establish a [life], even a [life] of prayer, a [life] of fasting, a [life] of faith, a [life] of learning, a [life] of glory, a [life] of order, a [life] of God; That your incomings may be in the name of the Lord, that your outgoings may be in the name of the Lord, that all your salutations may be in the name of the Lord, with uplifted hands unto the Most High"

Verses 16 through 18"And that this [life] my be a [life] of prayer, a [life] of fasting, a [life] of faith, a [life] of glory and of God, even thy [life]; That all the incomings of thy people, into this [life], my be in the name of the Lord"

Verse 20 "And that no unclean thing shall be permitted to come into [my life] to pollute it."

There are more scriptures in that section that can be changed. I suggest that you go and read it. It really did make me think about my life and how I live. The temple is supposed to be a reminder to us. It is God's house. A place where we can find peace, receive answers to prayers, and a place where we make special covenants with our Father in Heaven. Now when I see the Temple I can be reminded of those things along with it reminding me to look at my own life and see where I am and how I am doing.

Answer to a Prayer question

Over Christmas I had a reader asked me a question about a website. She wanted to know what I thought about it, not being sure how she felt about it. The website is http://www.prayermarket.com/.

Prayer is a very powerful tool and it is very special. I love how Elder Richard G. Scott put it. He said, "Prayer is a supernal gift of our Father in Heaven to every soul. Think of it; the absolute Supreme Being, the most all-knowing, all-seeing, all-powerful personage, encourages you and me, as insignificant as we are, to converse with Him as our Father. Actually, because He knows how desperately we need his guidance, He commands, "Thou shalt pray vocally as well as in thy heart; yea, before the world as well as in secret, in public as well as in private. (D&C 19:28)""

As Elder Scott said God is literally our Father in Heaven. We need, and He wants, us to have a personal relationship with Him. The only way we can have that relationship is if we pray to Him ourselves. In Revelations chapter 3 verse 20 it reads, "Behold, I stand at the door, and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me." It is up to us as individuals to build that relationship.

I don't think there is anything wrong with asking people to pray for us or to pray for someone in need. There is strength in numbers and sometimes our combined faith can bring about many marvelous miracles according to God's will. There is something special when someone prays for you. I have had many prayers offered in my behalf. I have felt those prayers and when someone comes to me and tells me that they are genuinely praying for me and my circumstance, I feel very humbled that they would take the time to speak to the Lord concerning me.

The biggest problems that I see with this website is the money part. Paying someone to say your prayers in not right. First, it doesn't allow you to build your relationship with your Father in Heaven. Second, and probably the most important, is that you can't buy spiritual things. In Acts chapter 8 the apostle Peter was baptizing people and then giving them the gift of the Holy Ghost by the laying on of hands. Then in verses 18-21 it reads, "And when Simon saw that though laying on of the apostles' hands the Holy Ghost was given, he offered them money, Saying, Give me also this power, that on whomsoever I lay hands, he may receive the Holy Ghost. But Peter said unto him. Thy money perish with thee, because those hast thought that the gift of God may be purchased with money. Thou hast neither part nor lot in this matter: for thy heart is not right in the sight of God." Then Peter tells him, "Repent therefore of this thy wickedness, and pray God, if perhaps the thought of thine heart may be forgiven thee."

I have a testimony of the power of prayer. I know that it works. I know that our Father in Heaven listens to our prayers. I know that He answers them according to His will and His time. I know that if we take the time to pray to Him we will feel His love for us as individuals and our lives will be blessed!

SJohnson, I hope this has answered your question concerning this website. If you would like to, here are a couple more scriptures concerning prayer:
Matt 6:5-15
Also Elder Henry B. Eyring goes into a little more detail concerning these scriptures in one of his talks entitled, "Write upon My Heart".
Thank you for your question.

If you have any of you have questions for me, I would love to hear them. I will answer them to the best of my knowledge and how I feel about the subject.